A Collection of City Thoughts

Saturday, October 17, 2009

on being a bridesmaid...

When we lived together back on College street, the question would often surface. Who first? Back then marriage was banter over cigarettes and wine. Who first? You'd point at me with your smoke and roll your eyes. Then I'd give you the finger, flick my ashes your way.

The other day, when you asked me how much I'd be willing to spend on a bridesmaid's dress, and I said, "Um, I don't know, maybe 100 bucks?", your eyes drooped a little. I realize now that was an awfully insensitive thing to say. You must know I was being sincere, right? I just don't know protocol, tradition, anything about this. I need a handbook. I need to get over the fact that neither of us smoke anymore. That wine gives me headaches now. That you're the first. That nothing stays the same.